Everything is Clear
by magnoliast
Summary: Draco and Hermione meet to discuss what to do when the war begins, and realize there's nothing they can do. Song: Oh, My Love by John Lennon.


The war would begin soon, he knew, and he feared it. After his father had been sent to Azkaban, he began to realize that the Malfoy name was as powerful or invincible as he'd always thought. It was a hard decision to make, and although he'd already decided, he wasn't consciously sure of his decision. He looked up at the moon and its faint glow, then out into the horizon. Hermione should be here by now, under the tree where they'd had their first meeting. It wasn't like her to be late.

_"I wish you'd be more careful on that broom. You could really hurt.."_

_"Since when did you start caring about my injuries?" he spat._

_"I meant the tree," she frowned._

_"Oh Merlin, let's hope you don't start some doomed organization about trees now," he mumbled as he helped himself up._

Hermione finally appeared, and she walked up next to him, following his gaze to see what exactly he was staring at. He smirked as he noticed her bushy little head at the corner of his eyes, and slowly his arm snaked around her waist.

"What took so long?"

"Ron. He kept badgering me, first about homework, and then about where I was going off to."

"Figures, he's a blood-sucking leech. Both of.."

"Don't."

He held back, a sigh of disappointment escaping his lips as he let go of her and made his way to the trunk of the tree, leaning against it. She shot him a look of confusion, but only followed it with a frown as she made her way to the tree trunk, also. Her head found his shoulder, and she rested it there as her fingers entwined into his.

"What are we doing out here, Malfoy?" she asked softly, using his last name as neither of them had ever bothered to change the way they addressed each other.

"I don't know. I asked you here for a reason ... " he began, uncertain. Honestly, he didn't really know where this was going, either. His jaw clenched and his gaze slowly fell on her. "I've been thinking about the war .. and graduation. You know as well as I do that it's going to start soon."

She frowned. "It seems that way. What about it?"

His eyes flickered, but didn't reveal anything. How could she be so certain, so unnerved? As he was falling to pieces, his head carrying a mess of contradicting thoughts that all lead to the same unknown thing, she was so stable. It was as if they'd switched places for this one instance.

"Father will be expecting me to become a Death Eater."

"But he's in Azkaban," and suddenly a wave of uncertainty and concern came over her, "surely you're not going to do that?"

He noticed that what she said was more of a question than a statement and he looked away momentarily. When he looked back, he saw the urgency in her eyes, the worry, and he didn't want to deal with any of it. Why he had called her here to begin with was now becoming a mystery. Wanting to postpone this, he leaned over and kissed her, his arms wrapped around her, wanting to engulf her so that she'd always be a part of him. But, as always, Hermione had been too quick for his tricks. Before she could lose herself, she managed to shove him off of her.

"Draco, please .."

What traps she could concoct. She was a trap herself, and he had fallen in long ago .. now it was too late to escape, for he was worn out. What a low blow, using his name that way, knowing that it did get to him. He ran his hand through his soft, pale blonde hair once to signify that he was stressed and trapped.

"Fine. So I didn't bring you out here to make out."

"Then why?"

"Hermione, just because my father's in Azkaban doesn't mean his expectations of me have changed. It doesn't mean that he's dead, and that nothing I do will matter anymore! And don't you think Voldemort knows Lucius has a son?"

He sure knew how to duel, it was one of his strong points. No matter what you threw at him, it would come flying back at you tenfold, leaving a permanent scar. Of course she knew, but that didn't mean she was willing to accept it. There had to be something, somewhere.

"There are ways around that, I'm sure ..." she whispered.

"Such as?"

"Screw expectations, Malfoy. Just switch over to the good side," she said, half pleading.

He let out a frustrated groan. "Merlin, Granger ... as if I haven't thought of that. I just can't do it, I'm not _good_. Nor will I be ... and the thought of fighting beside Potty and Weasel, against the people I grew up with! They may not be angels, but I'm part of them." He swallowed, and looked down at her, his head tilted. "Why don't you join me?"

"You know I can't betray what I've always represented ... what I've always known. Just like you can't," she frowned slightly and burrowed her head into his chest. "It's getting late." She felt a disruption in his breathing and looked up. It was as almost as if he was choking, for that one moment, but then the look was gone and his facial features returned to his normal cold expression.

"So it is," he kissed her forehead, pulling her into a tight embrace, his hand slipping a note into her pocket. With a wry smile, he let her go and turned to leave.

"See you on the battlefield, Granger," he called out as he walked toward the castle. She leaned back against the trunk of the tree, feeling as if she couldn't support herself any longer. Holding back tears, telling herself that she wouldn't lose composure because he never lost it, not once. At that moment, the wind picked up and prickled her with icicles, so she dug her hands into her pockets to keep warm, but was surprised to find a piece of paper in there. Quickly, she took it out and unfolded it in order to read it. She found it harder to hold back all her emotions, but managed to anyway. This way, she'd feel as though she were part of him somehow.

_for the first time in my life, my eyes are wide open_

_for the first time in my life, my eyes can see._

_everything is clear in my heart._

_everything is clear in our world._

_oh my love .. for the first time in my life,_

_my mind is wide open, for the first time in my life_

_my mind can feel._

_I feel the sorrow, I feel the dreams,_

_everything is clear in my heart._

_I feel life .. I feel love,_

_everything is clear in our world._

_- Draco._

Despite the fact that her tears were blurring her vision, though they would never fall, everything was clear (in her mind and in her world) as she made her way toward the castle.


End file.
